How we deal with bullies

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It never ceases to amaze me the number of people who want to affix negativity to a certain parenting approach simply because it's an approach that they would not choose for themselves.

My latest episode for Momversation (with Giyen and Alice) is up and in it we discuss how we help our children deal with bullies. This sounds incredibly braggy, but because I think good traits should be commended, I'm just going to write it: my children - Liam especially - have cooler heads than most adults. Liam regularly demonstrates a compassion and respect for others that floors me. I'd like to chalk it up to my, ahem, simply awesome parenting, but I think a lot of it is just his genetic makeup. That being said, I related a story in the Momversation episode about how he stuck up for a little girl with whom she was playing when a boy began to first tease, then physically bully her.



Liam is like me in that I have zero tolerance for poor behavior. I believe that cruel people thrive on the apathy of others. My son saw what was happening with this girl, his friend, and because he is taught that a) you never hit or manhandle women and b) you stick up for your friends when they need you, he politely asked the kid to stop repeatedly (diplomacy!); when the boy wouldn't and grew more aggressive, Liam knocked him down.

And I was proud. And I do not feel bad for feeling proud that my son demonstrated chivalry in a world where we're taught that chivalry is bad, to cover your head, take it, and hope that whomever is picking on you doesn't break one of your bones.

After a rash of fights in my school the principal sent home a letter to all parents instructing their children to cower in the floor and cover the backs of their necks with their hands if a bully tried to fight them. My mother read that and strung a few profanities together before telling me that I had her permission to not like like a pansy in the floor, to defend myself.

"In fact," she said, blowing cigarette smoke out of her mouth, "you BETTER defend yourself."

I raise my children to believe that their bodies are their temple, so if you respect the gift of that body why would you not defend it?

Some of the commenters at Momversation were appalled that I would be proud of how Liam handled the situation with the bully he encountered. I hear these arguments all the time; people try to bring up my faith and quote "turn the other cheek" while glossing over the story of Jesus flipping over the money changer's tables in the temple and shouting that they were a "den of thieves." (Also ignoring Matthew 10:34.)

It saddens me that we live in an era where the root of bullyism is not criticized but a parent telling their child to not be a victim when and if diplomacy fails is somehow.  I'm sorry, but that's seriously messed up.

How did this get to be the fault of the victim? We see this played out over and over again in society: in rape cases, etc. How dare the victim.

I've been bullied before and I'm telling you right now, those precious authorities that the kids are supposed to report to - like some nanny state? Completely ineffective. Making a child dependent upon officials who, statistically do not solve the problem, is a further blow the that child's self-esteem. It also makes kids dependent upon this nanny state of authorities instead of relying on his or her own ingenuity and diplomatic capabilities.

We're not teaching our children to be self-sufficient by removing from them the power to stand up for themselves and handle their own situations.

I refuse to buy into that. I also refuse to fail my child by not teaching them the difference between fear and an actual threat; or how to diffuse situations with words and that getting physical is the last resort. But sometimes people may want to hit you and no amount of sweet-talk will stop that and as of such, I am teaching my children when to recognize that situation and how to react accordingly.

You know how you stop bullies? By standing up to them. By refusing to allow them to victimize you. If you can simply ignore them and your inattention does the trick, fabulous; but more often than not, such an action doesn't stop bullying behavior. Bullying is caused by an epic parenting fail and it is perpetuated by a failure to stop it in its tracks.

You are free to agree or disagree; but I've made my choice and my children won't be victims.

61 Comments

This is why I read your blog. It is so nice to not feel so alone in my parenting choices. Thank you for addressing this. I was apalled at the commentary on the momversation site last night.

Um, yes.

I have nothing really to add to this, execpt my complete agreement.

Dana I agree with you 100% on this issue.

When I was in preschool a little girl kept biting me. My parents went to the head of the school as well as my teacher and they did nothing. It finally got to the point where my dad taught me to make a fist - and the next time she bites you - to hit her. So I did - and knocked her out. (I did get kicked out of preschool).

I do believe there is a point where going to the teacher or someone of authority doesn't help. If it came down to it and my daughter was be physically harassed by someone and no one was stopping it that I would hope she would defend herself - even if it was physically.

Hello, Comrade Dana. I'm sorry to hear your getting so much hate mail for teaching your kids to defend themselves. Those people are just namby-pamby Bambis' However, I'm sort of in the middle on this one. I am a firm believer in turning the other cheek as much as possible, but I recognize the fact that some people in this world just want to watch the world burn. There is no reasoning or diplomatic way to handle those types. (sometimes you just gotta kick their ribs in : ) As far as whether it's Christian to defend yourself in these types of situations, I lean more towards your point of view. I know Jesus was no Ghandi. Ghandi was weak, Jesus was simply meek. There is a huge difference. I don't think that Jesus was a complete pacifist. Even Christ told his disciples at one point that if they didn't have a sword, to sell their cloaks and buy one. And you also mentioned the whole episode of him turning over the tables in the temple. I am sick and tired of all these false feminists trying to indoctrinate boys into behaving like spineless eunuchs. Boys need to be taught how to be men. Nuff said. God Bless you, Dana

I agree! Many people would be surprised to know that karate actually teaches non-violence. Walk away, talk it out, try to defuse the situation.... but be prepared if that does not work!

Much of what we teach our toddlers ends up tested in these situations. I have a 3yr old daughter and I wrote an [url http://braveheartwomen.com/blog-entry/Passionparents-Blog/Parenting-Playing-Sharing/13000000447]article[/url] about teaching her it is OK not to share everything!

I know, that goes against play ground etiquette in many people's minds. But there is an important reason why you do not want your daughter to feel she has to share everything and please everyone... think about it.... is that what you want her to have at her core on her first date?

Check out my [url http://braveheartwomen.com/blog-entry/Passionparents-Blog/Parenting-Playing-Sharing/13000000447]blog[/url] and leave me your thoughts.

Thank you for the great conversation regarding parenting about bullying!

Here's to being a Passion Parent!
Christine
www.PassionParent.com

Wow...this is an issue with a lot of gray area. But I have to say, my priority is to impress on my boys that nothing good can come from fighting. It's easy to romanticize fighting...say it's part of becoming a man, but that's BS. Frankly, most men have never been in a fight, which is good, because they can go south fast -- broken eye socket, concussion, knife, gun, etc.

So the only time I could condone fighting is if the other guy literally attacks you. Obviously, defend yourself. And maybe I'm missing a detail, Dana, but it sounds as though Liam made first contact. If so, that doesn't sound appropriate. Why can't he turn to an authority figure (parent, teacher, etc.) to handle it? That's the authority figure's job. Doing so doesn't teach the kid that he can't stand up for himself. Stand up all you want; talk him down, diffuse, whatever, but you can't initiate physical contact.

Our school has quelled bullying by elimnating the tattle-tale syndrome. It's understood that kids must report teasing/bullying immediately. And that's how it works in society -- we call the police to handle problems; we don't take the law into our own hands.

Bravo Dana, B.R.A.V.O. Thank you for having the guts to speak up about this.

This is exactly what I teach my teenage boys - and you ain't SEEN bullying until your kids get into high school: be polite, be firm, be smart (don't get yourself into trouble by throwing the first punch) use your intellect, not your fists, then walk away. Be flippant, be sarcastic, do whatever it takes to close the deal in a peaceful manner first.

However, if someone punches my kid or gets physical with them in any way, after trying the above, I do not expect them to stand there and take it, they have my full permission to defend themselves.

It disturbed me in the momversation that the general consensus was that 'witty' or 'quick' comebacks (aka: biting words) were better medicine for such situations.

How is demeaning or making fun of someone by using sarcasm, wit, or the naked truth better than knocking the kid on the floor?

THAT is what bothered me. Not the acceptance of violence, but the suggestion that words are BETTER and LESS HARMFUL.

That assumption is false. As a kid, I would have opted to get smacked a million times before I would have chosen to be called "a big, fat bully" or an "ugly scum of the earth".

I completely agree. I don't have boys, but am teaching both my girls the same approach. Words first; but if that doesn't work, you have my permission to defend yourself and put an end to the bullying by whatever means necessary.

To this day, my mom believes that the greatest disservice she did to my brother was forbidding him to fight back when he was bullied in elementary school. Respecting yourself demands that others respect you as well; allowing yourself to be literally or figuratively stepped on is a really dangerous road to go down.

I was bullied as a kid, and most frequently, ignoring the bullies, or not letting them know they were bugging you put a stop to it. The fun ended for them.

"Fighting back" by sassing them would have made those situations worse, by far.

However, there was one kid who simply wouldn't leave me alone and it was becoming somewhat physical. One day I snapped and decked him.

It was my one and only "fight." There wasn't a return punch, and that was the end of the bullying. Sometimes, that's what it takes.

Way to go! When I was a kid I was bullied by a boy on my bus. He would hit me on the head with his lunch box all the time. Back then they were metal people! I remember telling my teachers and the bus driver. My parents complained to the school and nothing was ever done about it. Finally, what fixed the problem permanently was a little "conversation" between my older sisters and this boy. My parents finally had enough of my being bullied, and since they couldn't talk to the kid themselves without getting who knows what kind of trouble, they had my older sisters meet my bus when it got to their school. Because they were kids getting on my bus wasn't a big deal to the driver and talking to the other kid wasn't noticed. What they did that day made them my heros. They cornered the kid who was much bigger than me but was a shrimp compared to them and threatened him within an inch of his life. Or that's what I'd like to believe. They never put a finger on him. I never heard what all they said to him but I know that he was scared to even look at me after that and he didn't hit another kid on the head that rode that bus.

Long story short. The bully got bullied right back and learned a good lesson in life. There is always someone bigger than you and it might just be a big sister.

I know not all kids have the availability of an older sibling but sometimes just telling an authority figure doesn't work. Sometimes taking action does and words can go a long way.

you say it, sister.
"cruel people thrive on the apathy of others." hell yeah.
what liam didn't wasn't improportionate at all.

Amen Sister! We need more parents to raise their children to stand up for themselves. It astounds me how the public school system if left unchecked will raise the next generation to be even more dependent on the government because they won't know how to defend themselves or stand up for themselves. My husband and I have our 2 sons in Hapkido and it teaches them how to have self confindence and to take care of themselves. My eldest had to use his knowledge in Hapkido to defend himself and school, but ever since he did, that boy has not bothered him again. And the bully was a good 12 inches taller and probably 40 pounds heavier. I listen to you Dana on the radio, keep up the good work. My husband also came down to the riverfront for the tea party and was very impressed by you.

Andrew sounds a little too ... trusting of authority. Of course your kids can't go around throwing punches at every disagreeable turn, but I still say what Liam did here wasn't improportionate to the situation: The boy was repeatedly physically violating Liam's (younger, female) friend by dumping sand on her in a non-playful way, from how the situation was described. Sure, an authority figure stepping in is great, but that's not always an option. Dana's point was (correct me if I'm wrong) that she wants her boys to have the, um, balls to stand up for themselves and their friends, and sometimes that means a physical presence.

I wish I'd had a friend like Liam when I was in school!

Like many commenters above I was bullied quite mercilessly by several boys in my grade six class. They'd follow me home from school, throwing snow balls and hurling obscenities. After one episode where one boy spit his gum in my hair my parents finally spoke to the teacher. Of course this did nothing but humiliate me in front of my eleven year old classmates. For the most part my parents advised me to ignore them - never once teaching me how to defend myself. This is part of the reason I'm still learning how to do so today.

My feelings on this subject pretty much echo what others have said, if my son is dealing with a bully he should never start the fight-but I will tell him he has permission to end it.

Having experienced bullying firsthand I have seen teachers do little to stop it. Maybe that's where parents become more involved in holding officials accountable in getting these types of issues resolved.

Totally in agreement with you. I was verbally bullied a bit in grade school and I never learned well how to deal with it. It was a Mean Girls type situation, group think and all that jazz. It stopped when I went to junior high and the little clique was separated by school boundary lines that sent some of the girls to one school and the rest to the other. I became good friends with one of the girls who bullied me in grade school. She even apologized to me once in high school about it.

That said, I agree that diplomacy is best, but sometimes, the only thing a bully understands is a physical action to stop the bullying, like Liam pushing his friend's bully down or a punch. I once punched one of my bullies (a guy from my class that lived nearby) when he started making fun of me and I finally had enough. I told him to stop, that I wasn't his punching bag. I told him he was mean. I told him to leave me alone. None of it worked, so blam! I punched him in the mouth. A year later, he called me to apologize for the treatment he gave me, and I apologized for hitting him. Then he asked me out. I didn't go out with him. I was compassionate, not stupid.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

This is all what I have been preaching for months! I want my son to have enough confidence, enough belief that I will back him up, enough gumption to stand up for himself and others.

Unfortunately, my son (just three years old) is more mild-mannered than that and we have been struggling with this.

A few weeks ago, a little boy practically threw my son to the ground to get his favorite fire truck away from him. I was horrified that my son just took it. He made no move to defend himself.

We talked about it the whole way home in the car. He was struggling to process what had happened and wanted me to give him some direction.

I explained to him that he has the right to choose who touches him, who plays with his favorite toys, etc. He should not begin with violence, but he should tell him no, firmly and if that didn't work, he should push him away.

Bullies count on you being weak and allowing them to do their evil deeds. By permitting it continue, we appease and encourage them.

Our entire society is suffering for enduring bullies.

I totally agree with you. Bullies can be so destructive..both emotionally and physically. We have taught our kids not to put up with and yes defend themselves and do what needs to be done to stop it. Going to the principal is a joke. Anyone that has ever dealt with it and been on the recieving end knows how bad it can get. So I disagree with Andrew, I have went to the "authority" many times in the past and they do next to nothing.. My kids are taught not to be one that cowers in a corner, it will only get worse if they did.
You did the right thing!

The only thing I question though, is what about the bully him/her self? I would like to see more effort on their parents in trying to identify the reason the kid is acting out in such a way-more importantly, if the parents are the issue that school officials get involved.

Hi Dana,

Here's something I have never understood about the bullying issue --- the idea that "there are bullies everywhere, you just have to deal with it." Sadly, people in my family have said that to me. I was never bullied, but my husband was when he was a child. I was that kid who pushed the bully down for picking on the small girl from the very poor family. You don't have to "just deal" and I think by teaching our kids that, it will prevent a lot of bullying.

I have to put my social science researcher hat on for a second: several studies have shown that fights and bullying incidents have been stopped by just ONE person (student) saying "STOP!" and intervening. Just one. I'd be proud if that was my kid --- the one who would be willing to put his reputation or whatever on the line to protect the other guy.

Excellent post!

This just makes me want to scream "YES!" Finally a parent who gets it!! The school I teach in has a 'no tolerance' policy for bullying or fighting, but because they "can't prove who's in the wrong" both the bully and the bullied get expelled from school and a ticket(!!!) for assault. This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard of. I never send students to the office for this behavior because I'm afraid the victim will also be disciplined. I'd rather deal with the actual bad guy in my classroom. When diplomacy fails, you have the right to defend yourself, and that's what we should be teaching our kids. Yay Dana!

I agree wholeheartedly with you on this topic. My personal belief is that there is no place for starting a fight - EVER - but that if someone picks on you? You SHOULD defend yourself. Yes, there are times when you should turn the other cheek, but sometimes turning the other cheek is counterproductive. It teaches the bully to repeat his or her behavior, and more than that, you are telling that person that you don't believe you are worth standing up for. If you aren't worth defending, why shouldn't you be walked all over?

Dana, many years ago,(45 years) my dad told my sister and I to stand up for ourselves and what was right.

In the 2nd grade, my younger sister had a bully on the bus. After weeks of being harassed, bothered, poked, hit and teased she told him she was going to hit him with her lunch box (metal) if he didn't stop. He didn't and she did! He had a lump on the head and an angry father, who proceeded to try to bully our dad. It was useless effort on the bully's dad part, and the bully never crossed my sister's path again. I'm not advocating weapons (or lunch boxes) but she has never, since that time had a problem standing up for her self.

From my experience bully's are, or have been raised by a bully. The best we can do for our children is to teach them integrity, fair play and self-defense!

I've tried to teach my girls to be respectful of themselves and others...to try to be empathetic of other people's feelings, however - if someone does something to you, and you can't resolve it peacefully - please feel free to stand up for yourselves. There is a list of a few situations I've actually instructed my daughters to PLEASE knock out the person attempting to bully them...with specific instructions to have the teacher/principal/director or whomever call me and *I* will handle it from there.

My 3 (almost 4) year old daughter was being bullied by a little boy in her preschool class. It upset me on many levels because after more than one instance of the boy trying to pull down her pants, the only punishment the boy ever received was being placed in time-out. I advised the instructor that I didn't want the 2 children anywhere near each other. A few days later I picked her up to find a bruise under her eye, and discovered that the SAME boy hit her in the face with a book. I had her moved. I listened to the director and teacher try to explain that he was a "good" kid, that it's only "her" that he bullies...sadly, I guess - it didn't really matter to me. I *guess* I understand their position - but decided it was MORE irresponsible of me to allow her to continue to be in that situation, and if they didn't agree, then it wasn't the place for her.

The weiredest thing to me is she still refers to the boy as "her friend."

I sometimes think that the people who get upset about teaching kids to defend themselves are somehow confused and think it's the same thing as teaching them to be aggressive.

My husband and I have both told our oldest daughter - grade one - that if someone is bothering her, to talk to a teacher or the principal. However, we've also told her that if someone is physically harming her, that she has every bloody right to stand up and hit back. She's taught not to hit first, but I'll be damned if I'm going to tell her to curl up on the ground and take it if someone is hitting HER. Defend yourself first, THEN go talk to someone.

I'm with you 100% on this.

I would have signed in, but I don't have any of those accounts. Guess I'll have to do something about that.

I agree with you. I teach my children to believe in themselves and to stand up to bullies. It's part of what makes them responsible, independent young men.

The powers that be at schools are frequently trying to walk a very thin line. They don't always do it very well. That's too bad, since they are, nominally at least, our kids' "role models."

I have a terrible time with many of the policies at public schools. I try to remember the inordinate pressures that fall on them.

Especially when I'm chewing them out.

Yeah. I will tell my child to walk away, but if they follow you & do it again, then defend yourself. I will also emphasize that it is better to do this in front of witnesses, so that she isn't the only one to get in trouble. And she will.

BIG reason why I'm choosing private school...

My husband and I agree with you 100% on this issue. Very well said.

"All that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing." - Edmund Burke.
Good job, Mom, you're raising some good men.

Way to Go Liam! My husband and I feel the exact same way. We have 4 girls and I think that they all need to be 'tough chicks'. Not to say that I want them to be the bullies, but we want them to be able to defend themselves and know when its right and wrong to stand up for what they know is right. THe No Tolerance policy is crap. All of those parents are just raising kids that are going to always be looking for someone else to get them out of problems in life instead of standing up and doing it themselves....
Thanks so much!

Your son is going to grow up to be the boy that the girls are all giddy about. I love that he pushed the boy down. He warned him nicely...so he got what he deserved.

I have to disagree with Gregg above, who claims that ignoring bullies works. That's what my parents told me. "The kids at school are teasing you/pushing you down in the halls/calling you names? Just ignore them. They just want to get your goat, and if they don't get a reaction, they'll stop."

Liars. They said my brother would stop teasing if I ignored him---never worked. And WHY should the one being teased be the one to modify THEIR behavior, and try to quell the emotions that the bullying evokes? Seriously.

Go Liam. We are also teaching our kids to try to talk it out, walk away if you can, but if that bully keeps bugging you and won't go away, you challenge him or her. Usually a bully is, deep down, a coward. A yellow-bellied coward.

A human taught well, should always stand up for what's RIGHT. I defended a girl on the bus whose cousin was hitting her & spitting on her, with words, as in: "how would you like it?" He never did it again. (I was a girl at the time, I also had 4 brothers, so I knew how to defend myself.) It's important to teach your kids the difference between right & wrong in all circumstances. I believe we are being bullied by the current administration, & our rights are in danger, I'm standing up, are you?

Way to go Dana! Glad you spoke up about this. I don't want my son to be a sissy and my husband is teaching him how to box. Why can't we go back to the times where the boys were tough and didn't take harasing from others. We need to be more vocal about this!
Mel (mom to 2 tough boys)

I agree TOTALLY. I'm so glad to see someone speaking up about this.

Fucking YAY.

Part of fostering accountability in a wee person is equipping them for survival.

You've nailed it: There is a marked difference between dominating others and defending oneself. I've forever told my children, "You better not be starting the fight, but you better be finishing it." A bully challenged is one who hesitates to bully the next guy down the line, you know?

I must say, you are right on. There is a difference between condoning fighting and teaching your child to stand up for themselves and others. I am a redhead and was teased my entire childhood and teenhood. It went from "carrot top" to "fire crotch" when I entered middle school, and once a boy in my grade actually threatened to "beat the fire out of me" I was very lucky that my best friend was not phased and on the bus on the way home from school, dumped a bottle of gatorade on his head (we are still best friends today) when even my boyfriend wouldn't speak up to defend me. Its that kind of compassion and diplomacy that, even when handled a bit childishly, is lacking in the world today. People should be absolutely appalled when another person is being teased, and should stand up for those who are afraid to stand up for themselves. Amen sister!

Interesting topic. I think I would have probably done the same as you did with your son. As long as my child is "handling" a situation, I stay out of it. I may have discussed whether hitting was the best response, but I wasn't there and I'm sure you have left out details. So I don't know.

Weird bullying story. There was a girl who would follow me around all during recess and make fun of me, taunt me, threaten. It was 6th grade. Had no idea what to do about it so I did nothing. Then one day in PE in the locker room she accidentally hit me in the head with a locker door. It really was unintentional. It hurt and I cried. She was so shocked that she immediately asked if I was ok and showed real concern. After assuring her that I was ok and I knew it was an accident, she left. She never bullied me again and to this day, I don't know why.

I encourage my kids to stand up for themselves and each other. They do. My daughter has no problem telling bullies to be nice. And she does it in a way that they don't bug her. I encourage confidence because I think most times, that diffuses the situation. But, when they are older, if they are physically threatened, I will encourage them to defend themselves. This topic, like any topic, will be addressed in stages and we aren't to that stage yet.

As a child, I was the perfect and sweet little girl...to a fault.

When I was five, a little boy kept tormenting my girlfriend. It pained me to watch her cry and I asked him to stop many times, but he thought the whole thing was funny.

The boy took great delight in making her miserable. Then one day when he was tormenting her again, something just snapped inside me. I raised my voice and insisted that he stop. When he didn't, I told him I would make him stop. He began to run, but I was faster. I tackled him, and pulled his pants down to his shoes.

He looked as if he wanted to crawl under a rock and hide when our teacher ran over to separate us. She told me how shocked she was at my behavior. I told her what had happened, but she was still upset with me. She said, "What happened to my little lady?"

Interesting thing about that little boy -- he never bothered my friend again and he wouldn't come near me.

Six years later, I encountered a female bully in school. Her favorite target was my friend and classmate. She used to hit my friend and call her horrible names until one day when I chased her up the jungle gym and down the other side. By the time that I was finished, she had two bloody shins and a very dirty uniform.

The nun in charge of the playground who saw everything told us we were dreadful children. She told us that we each had to write I Will Behave 500 times on separate blackboards. We both did as we were told.

My friend was never bothered by this girl again, and neither was any other child in our class.

In both cases, this behavior was so out of character for me, but I don't regret what I did. I don't encourage children to fight, but sometimes only action works.

I agree, I do have zero tolerance in bad behavior.Parents should be responsible of their child behavior at school. My kindergarten has been pick at school,eventhough he is using his words still some kids simply like hurting other kids feeling. Although his school is doing its best to correct those kids bad behavior. It always hurt when we learn our child is being bully. Tomorrow I will talk to my child teacher when I learn this evening that my son classmate spit on his face. I think the boy cross the line,his action is too offensive. As a mother ,its about time that I step in and correct it.

ullying is a big problem that affects lots of kids. Three-quarters of all kids say they have been bullied or teased. Being bullied can make kids feel really bad. The stress of dealing with bullies can make kids feel sick.

Bullying can make kids not want to play outside or go to school. It's hard to keep your mind on schoolwork when you're worried about how you're going to deal with the bully near your locker.

Bullying is intentional tormenting in physical, verbal, or psychological ways. facebook marketing
It can range from hitting, shoving, name-calling, threats, and mocking to extorting money and treasured possessions. Some kids bully by shunning others and spreading rumors about them. Others use email, chat rooms, instant messages, social networking websites, and text messages to taunt others or hurt their feelings.

Bullying is a big problem that affects lots of kids. Three-quarters of all kids say they have been bullied or teased. Being bullied can make kids feel really bad. The link wheel stress of dealing with bullies can make kids feel sick.

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Two charter schools are open – the Maine Academy of Natural Sciences at Good Will-Hinckley in Fairfield and the Cornville Regional Charter School – and seven more are under consideration by the state’s Charter School Commission,Timberland Women Boots.

On Tuesday,Timberland Women Boots, the commission will discuss next steps on the applications from Harpswell Coastal Academy, the Heartwood Charter School for Visual and Performing Arts in Kennebunk,Timberland Boots,Timberland Roll Top Boots, the Queen City Academy Charter School in Old Town and two virtual schools – Maine Connections Academy and Maine Virtual Academy.

The commission will also reconsider the Baxter Academy for Technology and Science in Portland, which has conditional approval,Timberland Boots.

The Fiddlehead School of Arts and Science in Gray also has conditional approval.

So far, the 10-school limit hasn’t been an issue, said Jim Banks, a Charter School Commission member who is also on the state Board of Education,Timberland Shoes.

Demand could outstrip charter schools’ capacity in the future,Timberland Shoes, he said,Timberland Boots, but it doesn’t right now,Timberland Boots Men. He said he expects the commission to discuss LePage’s proposal Tuesday,Timberland Roll Top Boots.

Banks had no comment on whether the cap should be lifted, but said he understands critics’ concern,Timberland Roll Top Boots,Timberland Boots Men.

“It’s a legitimate position to say they want to see how the charters are doing before removing the cap,Timberland Shoes,Timberland Hiking Shoes,” he said.

George Jacobs' land was developed in the 20th century and a male skeleton was found,Timberland Boots. The remains appeared centuries old and the man seemed to have died violently,Timberland Boots, perhaps of a broken neck,Timberland Boots Men,Timberland Hiking Shoes,Timberland Boots Men. In 1992 these remains were buried at Rebecca Nurse's house in what is now the town of Danvers although at the time of the witch trials it was known as Salem Village,Timberland Shoes,Timberland Boots,Timberland Shoes.

If these three folks found final resting place elsewhere there are still 17 unaccounted for victims: 16 that were executed by hanging and one, Giles Corey, who was pressed to death during his "interrogation,Timberland Shoes."

The Salem Witch Trials were a big deal. About 10 percent of the 1,Timberland Boots Men,500 person community was charged with the crime,Timberland Boots. Prof. Baker recounted that more than "150 persons were accused of witchcraft and had their lives ruined... two or three died in prison,Timberland Hiking Shoes."

The Massachusetts Bay Colony had a new governor in 1692 and Sir William Phips was the first ever to be born in the Colony. Prof. Baker ventures that because he was not a native Brit,Timberland Roll Top Boots, Phips,Timberland Shoes, "would not have wanted to appear soft on crime." And these trials were an effective "way to control the community with the fear of community wide evil and harm." In addition to controlling the populace,Timberland Hiking Shoes,Timberland Roll Top Boots, it also made the governor look tough to the King back in England who had given him power over the region.

The State Council of Higher Education for Virginia on Monday approved budget recommendations that ask for an additional $109 million,Timberland Boots Men, in part to help pay for a 2 percent salary increase for faculty,Timberland Roll Top Boots.

SCHEV unanimously approved its budget recommendations,Timberland Hiking Shoes,Timberland Roll Top Boots, which now go to the governor and the General Assembly for consideration.

Chairman Gil Bland thanked lawmakers for the $258 million investment in higher education that was approved last year. But he said additional funding was needed to help ease rising tuition costs and to keep Virginia's schools competitive in drawing both students and staff,Timberland Hiking Shoes.

"While the Council acknowledges the Commonwealth's financial constraints, we believe that additional funding in the second year of the biennium will help mitigate tuition increase,Timberland Women Boots, encourage innovation,Timberland Boots, and improve institutional and student performance,Timberland Hiking Shoes," Bland said in a release.

SCHEV recommended $71.5 million to provide more faculty and staff,Montana’s commissioner of securities and insurance,Timberland Boots Men, instructional materials, improve retention and graduation and increase in-state enrollment,Timberland Hiking Shoes. The 2 percent faculty salary increase would begin in July,Timberland Shoes.

Another $27 million was requested to provide financial aid,the cancer society's deputy chief medical officer,Timberland Hiking Shoes.

The General Assembly added $8,Timberland Roll Top Boots.4 million for undergraduate student financial aid in the two-year budget approved last year, but SCHEV member Stephen Haner said tuition and fees continue to rise and put additional stress families who "haven't seen their own budgets recover." He said the council estimates the amount they would need to close the gap will rise more than 19 percent next year,Timberland Shoes.

"These dollars keep young people in class with less debt," Haner added of the proposed financial aid increases.Clearly subscribing to the belief that more leaves equals more fun, a group of autumn enthusiasts assembled what must be one of the largest single pile of leaves. And for what purpose? Why, to jump into it from a roof, of course.

A group of guys gathered leaves from every corner of Utah. All told, they used nearly 1,500 bags of leaves to create a pile that (at its peak) reached 17 feet high,Timberland Boots Men.

This is clearly one of those "do not try this at home" clips. So,degrees Celsius, really. Don't try this at home (or anywhere else for that matter),Timberland Shoes. But do take a look. Who needs video games when you've got a bazillion leaves?

biggest of those weaknesses came from what was originally a strength — the zone coverage behind the blitz. Many of the earliest zone blitzes Arnsparger called in Miami were not actually "blitzes" as we think of them now. The Dolphins would rush only four players in total, simply swapping out a rushing linebacker for a zone-dropping defensive lineman. As a result, these defenses were just as sound against the pass as zone defenses that had been run for the past 50 or so years. Defenders dropped to a spot, watched for a receiver in that area, and broke on the ball as it was released. Even with the threat of blitzes, quarterbacks eventually started exploiting the many soft spots on the field,Timberland Hiking Shoes. Father Christmas,Timberland Roll Top Boots.

Nick Saban,more urban — and less equal” than we are today., currently the head coach at Alabama, was the defensive coordinator under Bill Belichick when the two were with the Cleveland Browns in the early 1990s. While speaking to high school coaches at a recent clinic, Saban summed up the early problems of traditional spot-dropping zone coverage: "Well, when Marino's throwing it, that old break on the ball shit don't work."

The answer that Saban,Timberland Shoes, Belichick, and many others developed was "pattern-match" coverage — essentially man coverage that uses zone principles to identify the matchups,Timberland Women Boots. As Saban explained at the 2010 Coach of the Year Clinics Football Manual clinicInitial reports from Eastleigh show scores have been injured in the revenge violence thus far, focused primarily in the suburb popularly known as “little Mogadishu,Timberland Boots Men.” Many people of Somali origin, who fled the prolonged conflict back home, have settled here. Since their arrival, the once nondescript neighborhood has transformed into a thriving business enclave.

“This is very bad. To isolate the Somalis and target them because of the blast is very deadly. If we don’t arrest it, it may backfire into a religious war,” says Rev. Wellington Mutiso, the general secretary of the Evangelical Alliance of Kenya.

Many Kenyans are suspicious of Somali activities here, and now accuse the immigrant and refugee community of shielding Al Shabab,Timberland Boots, the Somali Islamists who promised to attack Kenya after the country sent its troops into Somalia in pursuit of militants in October 2011,Timberland Hiking Shoes.

“We know Al Shabab recruited many Kenyans from all tribes and we believe the recruits have returned and [are] carrying out the attacks,” Reverend Mutiso says,state Auditor Adam Edelen, despite urging people not to target members of the Somali community with retaliatory violence,Timberland Roll Top Boots.

'CRIMINALS ... NOT A PARTICULAR COMMUNITY'

Yesterday evening, clashes between groups of youth left about 18 people nursing multiple machete and stone injuries after getting caught up in the violence. The violence broke-out soon after the Sunday afternoon attack on the minibus.

After a tense night in the suburb, the violence returned mid-morning today,Timberland Boots Men, with youths blocking roads and engaging riot police in foot chases.

Given all that Condoleezza Rice went on to accomplish in life, it's hard to
believe that she was born in Birmingham, Alabama in the Fifties during the repressive reign of Jim Crow segregation,Timberland Boots. But somehow, despite spending her formative years in a city where state-sanctioned discrimination served to frustrate the aspirations of most other African-Americans,Timberland Roll Top Boots, she miraculously managed to overachieve with the help of her doting parents.

The former Secretary of State pays tribute to their herculean effort in this remarkably-revealing memoir by a very private, public figure who has until now played her cards pretty close to the vest. But you had a sense something might be up when she was spotted playing piano behind Aretha at a concert in Philadelphia last summer. And after reading this intimate autobiography it's clear that underneath that seemingly-steely veneer beats the heart is an introspective sister yearning to recognize and return to her roots.

An evocative opus fully humanizing a once-inscrutable Madam Secretary,Timberland Boots Men. I just have one question: May I call you Condi at the homecoming party?

4. The Next Big Story
by Soledad O'Brien with Rose Marie Arce

In this engaging autobiography, CNN's Soledad O'Brien revisits her challenging formative years in order to illustrate how overcoming childhood adversity perhaps served to shape not only her personality but her compassionate approach to her career as an award-winning television journalist,Timberland Hiking Shoes.

Whether it was being asked "Are you black?" by a portrait photographer at the age of 11, being teased "If you're a [N-word] why don't you have big lips,Timberland Hiking Shoes.,Timberland Hiking Shoes?" by an 8th grader in the hallway at school, or having to hear "Why do I have to sit next to the black girl?" coming from the sister of a friend, Soledad suffered a host of indignities on the path to the peak of her profession.Lord Lloyd Speaks,Timberland Women Boots

Wall Street's latest lordly financial fatwa comes from notorious con artist and bailout king Lloyd Blankfein, the trial judge wrote. I'm sorryMore importantly. Under Blankfein's leadership Goldman Sachs has fraudulently deceived a wide range of investors, including pension and retirement funds for many of the very same Americans who would face even more financial hardship in their senior years if Blankfein's orders are followed by our elected leaders,Timberland Roll Top Boots.

Blankfein's comments followed the anti-social contract movement's inaccurate and misleading script to the letter:

"Social Security wasn't designed to ... support a 30-year retirement after a 25 year career," said Blankfein,In their defense. This is a variation on the "we're living longer" argument that's been debunked dozens of times. Americans who lived to the age of 65 are only living a little bit longer -- and the ones living the longest are the wealthiest among us,Timberland Hiking Shoes,Timberland Roll Top Boots, not the ones who rely on Social Security.

Blankfein's prescriptions come straight from the script, too: "The retirement age has to be changed, maybe some of the benefits have to be affected,Timberland Boots Men, maybe some of the inflation adjustments have to be revised."

Well, gosh,Timberland Boots. By uncanny coincidence,Timberland Shoes, that just happens to be exactly the kind of policy package proposed by Third Way ... and by the billionaire-funded individuals named Simpson and Bowles,Timberland Shoes, who issued a personal proposal after failing to get one out of their Presidential commission ,Timberland Hiking Shoes... and by the billionaire-funded Rivlin/Domenici group ...

And it happens to be exactly the kind of package which Third Way's outlier poll says Obama voters want to see,Timberland Roll Top Boots,Timberland Roll Top Boots.

Are we getting the picture yet?

Balancing Act

According to the note, Apple is testing two new iPhone prototypes, one expected to be the iPhone 5S and the other a low-cost iPhone,Timberland Shoes.

The tech giant is expected to begin making the new iPhone 5S in March for a launch within about four months,Timberland Roll Top Boots,Timberland Boots, Misek said in the note.

Misek also reduced his estimates for iPhone shipments for the current March quarter from 48 million to 44 million, a number that he said is "still well above widespread fears of shipments in the mid-30Ms,Timberland Hiking Shoes,Timberland Boots."

(Read More: Apple Stock Will Hit Bottom Here: DeMark)

As for the low-cost iPhone prototype-which is geared toward emerging markets- it is either close to getting the green light or has already been approved,Timberland Roll Top Boots,Timberland Hiking Shoes, he said,for one.

"Similar to the iPad mini,Timberland Roll Top Boots, we expect a concentrated low-cost iPhone, rather than a 'cheap' one,TimberlandWomenBoots," Misek said in the note.

Even though Apple's Phil Schiller dismissed rumors of a cheaper iPhone last week,Timberland Shoes,Timberland Boots, Misek said the company is likely to produce one. It would mimic its more grown-up predecessor, but without such features as retina display and LTE capabilities.

A less expensive iPhone would help boost Apple's market share,Timberland Hiking Shoes, but decrease gross margins and have little impact on earnings per share,Timberland Shoes.

(Read More: Technology Now a Drag on US Earnings)

Apple's last phone launch was the iPhone5 in October,Timberland Hiking Shoes,Timberland Roll Top Boots,Timberland Women Boots. Sales were strong in the fourth quarter but have been below expectations so far this year,Timberland Boots. (Read More Below the Video,Timberland Shoes.)

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