Dana: April 2010 Archives

New York and Wendy Williams

Me and Wendy

Sunday I flew to New York to appear on Wendy Williams' show for Momversation. Wendy, if you didn't know, was one of the first women to master and dominate radio, a pioneer for our sex in what is still predominately a man's industry, and was inducted into the radio Hall of Fame last November. 

Now she has a hit show and she and her staff welcomed me on and were as every bit kind and gracious as you can imagine. It was a blast. 

I also started the show and introduced Wendy but I'll have to yank that off the DVR and post separately because it's not online. I'm wearing PINK. One of Wendy's producers, Joelle, told me over the phone to wear something "fun and colorful." I looked at my closet and laughed out loud. Some people exaggerate and say that their wardrobe is all black and white. No -- mine is LITERALLY all black, white, and gray. It works because for someone who hates dressing herself, IT ALL MATCHES. 

I went to the mall and everything screamed PASTEL! PINK! LAVENDER! and I finally decided on a ruffled dress and teamed it with black tights and a pair of the most awesome Mad Max from Thunderdome rock boots I could find. 

Picture 15.png.Picture a.png

(That's Momversation Rob photobombing me in the background on the right.)

We discussed this episode and to the four people who wrote me saying that I was paranoid and that I was passing insane amounts of baggage onto my children who would likely grow up to lose all their teeth to meth and claim UFO abduction someday because of my paranoia: Wendy agreed with me. So did a lot of other women. 

It was a whirlwind trip and it rained the entire time, hard, which made it impossible for me to break out the Nikon and take some decent shots of the city. Another time. 

Before I went to bed on Sunday I turned off all the lights and curled up in the gigantic window and stared out over the city. Directly across from me was another hotel and while I saw people milling about their rooms, I think I was the only one taking in giant gulps of the view. It seemed easier to take in the city from up there, up from where the buildings are so tall they seem to close over you like hands clasping together. I liked how the rain and fog made it look like Gotham:

View from my hotel. Looks like Gotham

Thanks to Wendy, Dan, Joelle, and the entire crew for their kindness and hospitality. Watch for my interview with Wendy on Momversation. 

Programming Note

I'm leaving tomorrow for New York and Monday I'll be on the Wendy Williams Show to talk about the entry below for Momversation. For the first time in five years I purchased an outfit that was not black/gray/white to wear as they said, specifically, no black/gray/white. Wendy's producer said to wear "bold colors" and I thought hard as the only thing in my closet pre-shopping trip was that really bold black dress I'd worn to our friends' Greek wedding several years ago. 

I'm excited about the trip, even though it's brief, and look forward to hearing from a few friends while I'm there.
My latest for Momversation concerns being the mother of boys and the point at which your sons stop going with you into the ladies' bathroom and start going into the men's room. On their own. It's a scary prospect when you think of stories like this one. I'm not as concerned about Liam or Ewan forgetting to wash their hands (yes, ew, gross) as I am about them using a restroom alone and being in the same proximity as a child predator. 

By the way, for those who are considering using this as an anti-man thing in a fiery little email to me later, as a mother you AUTOMATICALLY look at every stranger as a possible predator. It's a driving instinct to protect your child; in the women's room with me there is no chance that they could be prey. In a men's room, alone, they certainly could be and it's happened to children before. 

Every now and then Liam will use the men's room solo (when we're not with Chris) but I'm always right outside the door. I continue to take them into the women's restroom but Liam is beginning to reject that altogether. I don't do "family restrooms" because once at the Y we tried the family restroom and it was all BOOBS AND BUTTS! BOOBS AND BUTTS! everywhere and just OMG no. It's a sweet gesture from whomever invented the idea but it doesn't work for tightly-wound people like myself. 

Anyway, here is our discussion on it. Am I being paranoid? Do I just hate men? What do you do with your boys? And if you're a dad and you have a daughter, GEEZ, you're in a worse position - how do you deal? For now you can comment on the Momversation site; I'll be opening up comments again when I return. 

Prayers Needed

Picture 14.pngJennifer Guffey photo

My cousin Jennifer has a 10-month-old baby boy named Jax who suffers from a rare liver disease called biliary atresia. Before he was eating solids they were told that he may require a liver transplant. 

The past 10 months Jennifer has been campaigning relentlessly to raise awareness for a disease which has no known cause and no cure. She was on my show last week to discuss what the disease is and how many are affected. She's also been raising money to help offset Jax's mounting medical bills. In fact, they've an upcoming art show: if you're an artist who would like to donate for a good cause, you can do so here.

Late last night while I was in my Nyquil haze (cold and strep throat. Again) Jennifer and her husband Ryan got the call. There is a liver for Jax. 

His transplant surgery is scheduled for 1pm central today. 

Please say a prayer for him, that his surgery goes well, that his little body accepts his new liver, that the doctors are well-guided; also say a prayer to comfort the grieving family of whom we know not, whose loss has given new life to Jax. 

Thank you  :)

Reading: Personal Weblog

One word ...

"The comment moderation is just one of several things I'm doing in an effort to take back blogging for myself so that I can continue on here in a way I can live with.


Here's the final bit of what I'd like to say about all of this, to be perfectly clear: this is a personal weblog, with a strong emphasis on PERSONAL ... I and I alone run this mother, and what I say goes within the tiny confines of this tiny amount of space I own on our internets. This isn't a public forum, and I don't owe anyone a voice."

... Amen.

It's one of the reasons I disabled comments on my website, when things elsewhere got heated. Case in point, some actual comments that have ended up in my inbox:

I'm just a Midwestern mom, too, Dana, and I used to read your Mamalogues and chuckle.  And then, well, what exactly happened to you?  Why did you sell out like this? 

- M Carney


I used to love to read you and then I realized your politics. Now I cannot bring myself to stand you.

- Sarah


It's unfair that you don't allow comments. How can you call this a blog when it's just you? You can't.  

- Erica

You were better when you kept your politics to yourself.

- Angie H

Finding out that mamalogues was conservative to me was probably what catholics feel like when they find out their son or daughter is gay.

- Vicky  

I discussed this here. There exist some who would prefer that I assist them in their charade of diversity by only writing about things with which they agree. When I decided to close comments last year I did so because people would read something I'd written for work somewhere else or heard me say something not non-political on air and they'd crap all over my comments with how stupid I was, how stupid my kids were, how stupid my husband was, how dare I attempt to GASP do motherhood and hold an opinion on the issues of the day, what did I think this was, THE YEAR 2010?

I don't care how selfish this sounds: I write here for me, first and foremost. When you stop writing for yourself your writing begins to suck. It's evident. I've seen it happen. Your voice stops being your own and all you're doing is taking dictation from either the voices in your head of what you THINK your audience wants to hear or from your audience directly.

I love people and I love writing and I love writing for people but unless Vicky, Angie, Sarah, M, and the others who've written me to chastise me for being "out of the closet" with who I am want to commission me to write about things which interest them, my motivation and what and how I write is not going to change.

I still connect with people on Twitter, Facebook, and email but in order for me to feel creative again I needed this space back, thus the comments. Someday that may change. I appreciate the understanding and support in the meantime.

Bad Friday Leads to Good Sunday

You know I've never been an Easter Bunny fan.

Picture 2.pngEspecially when they look like demon ... cats.

This has been a busy week with television ("Hardball" with Chris Matthews, Greta Van Susteren Friday night, and I'll be on Fox News again tomorrow), homeschool stuff (hatching sea monkeys is GROSS. More on that later), and radio.

I'm so looking forward to this weekend of rest and reflection.

It can be very easy to be pulled into a direction of bitterness and anger when you do what I do for a living. I try to remember that Christ had love in His heart even while people nailed Him to the cross, so we can at least also have love in our hearts for those who do less to us. It's so easy to love people who never criticize you, who never speak a word of fallacy or maliciousness against you. The test is to have that love for those who do so.

I'm thankful for His grace, His mercy, His sacrifice. I am so far from perfect and I can exhale, knowing that I can take place my burdens on Him. 

Wishing you a blessed and restful Easter.

easter.jpgMy favorite verses that I'm reflecting upon this weekend:

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." - John 3:16

"If God is for us, who can be against us?" - Romans 8:31
(Also shows the importance of being on the right side of God.)

"For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand."
- Ephesians 6:12 - 13
(Considering as a tattoo, the book, chapter, and verse numbers.)


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