Dana: June 2010 Archives

A Whole Other Type of Brazilian

So the other day, feeling completely tired and utterly hopeless about my hair, I did something quite dramatic to it. 

See, my hair is a lot longer than it was now when I made that chipper little video about how to finger curl my hair and look! I look just like Shirley Temple! Except that it's only cute to look like Shirley Temple when you're a kid, now when you're an adult women. I began to feel like an adult woman who might as well carry around a Hello Kitty accessory. 

So I had a friend email me and tell me about how she read that Nicole Richie and all these people with infinity more dollars than me get this thing called a Brazilian whatever. I immediately wondered why she was telling me about a bikini wax but she was all "No! For your HEAD!" So I followed her treasure hunt of links and ended up convincing myself that if I were to survive the rest of my life I would need one of these Brazilian things. Badly. I also did some research so I would know what to call it other than a "thing." 

There are several different types of Brazilian hair treatments, some are called Brazilian Blowouts with the trademark and everything, some are called Brazilian Silk, which is what I got, and others are called Brazilian Keratin Treatments, or BKTs for short, not to be confused with the BTK psycho killer. 

A short backstory: From washing to completed styling it takes me two hours to fix my hair. Because it's so thick it's an easy 30-40 minutes of drying time alone, another hour just to smooth it down and style it. It would take a good hour on the days I didn't wash it just to smooth and curl it all over again because my curls would go haywire in the night. Even if I straightened it using a Chi flatiron it was heavy due to my massive amount of hair and the oil I had to use to help smooth and weigh it down. I would get a couple of good days out of it and then after second-day-hair, that was it, start over. I did it rarely because it was such a tedious pain. Also, because of my work now, PJTV, regular appearances on national television, I HAVE to fix my hair every day. I have two kids, they're homeschooled, I work, we're slammed busy and I cannot CANNOT spend that much time on my hair every single day. 

My only other alternative at this point, since it was becoming unmanageable as it always does when I grow it out, was to cut it off again ... or get a Brazilian treatment. 

I did the latter. A woman with whom I work named Karen told me about her friend who does hair, her friend Heather, and how she is one of the few stylists in the area doing any sort of Brazilian treatment. I made an appointment and prayed that it would make my hair fall out or that it would actually work. I washed and wore my hair curly (in a bun) for one last day. 

Here is the before:

Here is me with two-hours worth of styled hair. Ignore Glenn Beck in the photo if he's not your thing. It's the most recent photo I have with me and my egregiously-long-to-style hair.

Me with GB.png
Look what I endure for you, Internet. I put up completely unflattering photos of my hair for you. JUST so another woman with freakishly uncontrollable curly hair that gets curlier and thicker the longer it grows may be spared the long hours I spent styling mine. 

Applying the treatment

Dudes! It was STRAIGHT WHEN WET. For me, that's like watching a stream reverse course. 

It. Was. Straight. Even. While. Wet.



With Heather at Elan, who is awesome. 

With Heather

And here is after:

Many thanks to Heather for staying late to treat my hair. Also thanks to two of my favorite girls, Heidi and Marjorie, for hanging out with me the three hours it took to get it done. It was fun!

ALSO - This is the video I did last year for Momversation showing you how I fixed my curly hair. It has grown a lot since then and the only way I could continue that regimen with my hair was to keep it that length, something I didn't want to do; I wanted it longer.

*UPDATED to add: I will update and let you know how it wears after a few washings. I purchased the special shampoo and conditioner needed to increase its longevity as well. 

**MORE UPDATE: I can STILL wear it curly. It takes curl just as it always did, but it's waaay more manageable now and won't poof out like a dandelion just because it's humid. 


- The treatment is to last 10-12 weeks.
- I have to learn how to dry straight hair.
- I purchased the Brazilian products to go along with it and omg folks, the conditioner is amazing. 

Programming Note

I'm finishing a rather meaty project which has been preventing me from posting as often as I'd like in this space. I can't go into it at the moment, but when I'm finished I'll be back here with more regularity/insanity.

In the meantime, Bustache:


Happy Father's Day


... to all the dads out there. You play such an important role in the family unit, one that is often made a joke and sadly, way under-appreciated in today's society. 

A special Happy Father's Day to Chris, for being such a rock these past couple of years as the world turned ... and spun fast enough to make my head spin. Thank you.

A Conversation

Scene, EXT 
It's 9 a.m. and I'm sitting at the dining room table staring/drooling in front of a breakfast burrito while already up for five hours and going on four hours of sleep. It's storming outside and the house feels chilly.

You know what? Forget the Snuggies. It looks like a wizard's outfit. Like Mickey from "Fantasia." Right now I could totally go for a blanket burrito. Like a swaddle. 

Like this?

Chris demonstrates wrapping up in a blanket, swaddle-style.

Exactly. Sometimes a person, an adult person, just wants to be swaddled. 

Yes, like a straight-jacket. 

Where to Find Me

If you're here because of the Playboy thing (a mention, not a photo spread, freaks) THIS is where I get dirty, politically-speaking. You'll also find links to my daily radio show, television appearances, et al. there. 

This is a personal website wherein I remark occasionally about my boys, a.k.a. the future rules of the galaxy. 

How AT&T Screwed Us Over

Yesterday afternoon I checked my spam folder and discovered, lost in an assortment of porn solicitations, email from some dude in Africa who told me he wanted me to inherit his millions, were a few emails from AT&T with recent dates informing us that they had improperly removed a nice chunk of cash, for us, from our bank account after we canceled our service with them a couple months ago. 

We called and called and called the customer number for AT&T and got nothing more than a fast busy signal. We thought this problem has been resolved, you see, AT&T had tried to take $220 from our account previously and we canceled service yet again. We've canceled service twice yet AT&T still likes sticking their hands in our cookie jar, and, to quote "Stepbrothers," DON'T YOU MESS WITH MY NUT.

So I did what any reasonable person would do, which was to take to Twitter and throw a fit since CALLING THEM ON A TELEPHONE wasn't working. I don't know if their customer service is based in the United States or is a fantasy and the whole of AT&T's customer service exists just as a number on a website that goes to nowhere, but it seems like it wouldn't be crazy to assume the latter. 

So on Twitter @ATTCustomerCare said she would help. Chris talked to her on the phone last night after I emailed my basic account info to her. Apparently, she's having the same difficulty as we are at getting her employer to give a rat's ass about resolving our issue because it's 11 a.m. central and this has been going on since early evening yesterday. I don't have patience WHEN IT COMES TO MY NUT. I'm not sure if this person is real, if she's a robot that AT&T made to further exasperate people by promising to help, getting them within an inch of thinking that they were going to be helped and then leaving them hanging, I don't know. I hope she helps.

Hey AT&T! We're a middle-class family and that $220 dollars you take a month? That's way over a week's grocery bill for us. That's over a month's worth of gas. That could cover a couple of our utilities. In an economy which is the way it is, I don't appreciate being forced to grab my ankles by a company that thinks it's OK to bilk middle class families out of money they use for essentials and then refuse to fix the problem. 

If AT&T doesn't fix the problem and refund what they took from us I will lodge a formal complaint and if I have to bring Johnnie Cochran up in here to talk about how in this case, the GLOVE FITS then so be it. 

My latest with Momversation: Nature vs Nurture

I'm just going to say now that Ewan came from the womb with my EXACT personality. It was shocking. I once called him my little George Carlin, minus the smoking and excessive profanity. My mother replied: "Just like you at his age." 


*UPDATED: My Roof is a Big Top

Small big top in the city

A couple of years ago we went to see Circus Flora, St. Louis's one-ring, Euro-styled circus nestled a whisper south of downtown. I've always loved the circus, especially how so many participants are families, performance dynasties. 

Circus Flora has reached out again this year and is offering two of YOU readers two four-pack, two-family tickets for their 24th season to see the opening night performance of Ingenioso, based on Don Quixote. Tickets are for TOMORROW, June 4th, at 7 p.m.
If you miss out on this giveaway, tickets start at just $8.

Because my comments are wonky and I'm preparing to move to an entirely new platform, what we'll do is this: if you're on Twitter and would like four free tickets to tomorrow's opening night of Circus Flora, @ me on Twitter and include the hashtag #circusflora. I'll pick two winning families THIS EVENING and afterwards get your information to give to the Circus Flora crew who will then have your tickets waiting at will call. 

In the meantime, here are a few photos from our last visit.

*UPDATE: We have winners!

I wrote down all the replies using the #circusflora hashtag on Twitter Liam and Ewan each drew a name. This is who they grabbed:

Lisa_S_47 and 

You each get four tickets for tomorrow's opening night performance at Circus Flora! I'll contact you via Twitter to get your info for the Circus Flora people. 

Thanks everyone! We'll do this more often :)

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Dana asks: "Thanksgiving Traditions: Yours or Your Mother's?"